I wanted to share excerpts from the book that I read recently which is "The Subtle Art of not giving a F***" by Mark Manson. This well renowned book made perfect sense to me only once I finished it a second time possibly as it was challenging the conventional self help ideologies.
My key takeways from the book are outlined below
The key to a good life is not giving a f*** about more; it’s giving a f*** about less, giving a f*** about only what is true and immediate and important.
We are no longer facing a material crisis. We have plenty of resources: TVs and clothes and goods that we don’t need. The problem we face is existential and spiritual. We have so much stuff and so many opportunities that we don’t know what to give a f*** about anymore.
The desire for a more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience.
Pursuing something only reinforces that you lack it in the first place.
Everything worthwhile in life is won through surmounting the associated negative experience.
When a person has no problems, the mind automatically finds a way to invent some.
Practical enlightenment is the act of becoming comfortable with the idea that some suffering is always inevitable.
You can’t merely be in love with the result. Everybody loves the result. You have to love the process.
Your problems are not privileged in their severity or pain. You are not unique in your suffering.
The more uncomfortable the answer, the more likely it is to be true.
Pleasure is a false god. Research shows that people who focus their energy on superficial pleasures end up more anxious, more emotionally unstable, and more depressed. Pleasure is the most superficial form of life satisfaction and therefore the easiest to obtain and the easiest to lose.
People who base their self-worth on being right about everything prevent themselves from learning from their mistakes.
Accepting responsibility for our problems is the first step to solving them.
Certainty is the enemy of growth.
The magnitude of your success is tied to how many times you’ve failed at that thing.
Action isn’t just the effect of motivation; it’s also the cause of it. Do something and inspiration will follow.
Getting into victim mentality is again getting into the entitlement mindset which is better avoided.
Trust is the most important ingredient in any relationship for the simple reason that without trust the relationship doesn’t actually mean anything.
The mark of an unhealthy relationship is when two people try to solve each other’s problems in order to feel good about themselves.
The moments when we don’t give a fuck and take action are often the moments that most define the course of our lives.
All of the meaning in our life is shaped by our innate desire to never truly die. Our physical bodies will die, but we cling to the idea that we can live on through religion, politics, sports, art, and technological innovation.